The Unsung Hero by Suzanne Brockmann.

Oops! I'd better be polite.

Obviously this book is written by a hugely talented and mega-successful author. But it is not for me. And I wondered why. Probably the reason is this. I think it’s weird if you still have the hots for someone you last met 16 years ago. And it’s disrespectful of what they may have made of their life. I absolutely know that serial monogamy is the norm nowadays…you marry and divorce (or change partners) every 5 years or so...but unless the writing is excellent I’m not that keen on reading about it. Romance, commitment, loyalty, respect, fidelity are all part of the same package. This novel is not for people who subscribe to that kind of thinking.

But most importantly. It’s not really a romance. More a small-town adventure caper. Like a grown-up version of Nancy Drew and Hardy Boys featuring the two old coots from the Muppet Show. And boring boring boring. Vanilla. Mainstream. Boring. Well written though I’ll admit. It’s just personal taste that I don’t like stories where characters bicker for pages and pages. Also it would take a lot of special special writing to make me accept a hero with male pattern hair loss.

Plus. Did I get this wrong. But there were a minimum of 3 courtships in this story. That's far too many. And each couple is a stereotype. Dork, SEAL, rich girl, coot; all cyphers. Everyone knows that like gets attracted to like. Especially in a small town. So all these couples manufactured purely to appeal to a diverse readership I found to be a construction too far.

I did finish the book. But no more. Give me interesting, stimulating, emotionally involving over successful any any day.

Confession Time

I've caved in. Because I'm grateful to adult authors who write entertaining books for grown-ups.

Not only am I buying Killer Secrets. Also Hidden Agendas. Of course Fire and Ice. (If only for the continuing adventures of Peter) And A.N. Other. But I haven't decided what yet. Maybe that Linda Castillo that nearly traumatised Rosario. Or a Christine Warren. She seems to get regular good reviews.

What's more. I'm quite excited about reading them tooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

Demon's Kiss by Eve Silver

Childish poop.

Another trailer-park romance with a no-life, no money heroine going gaga over the hero's wealth. Cripes! She's 28-years old with no friends and working in a flea-pit motel. Of course. She's also a medical student. But then again. Aren't we all? (hur, hur)

There's a hilarious scene where the heroine is attacked by a demon. She feels about on the floor for some kind of weapon and finds...a thumbtack!!! So wtf is the point of the scene?? Seeing how the thumbtack doesn't even get used.

I strongly suspected the high poop factor from the names of the hero and his friends. Ciarran, Darqun and Javier. I bet 90% of the readers (including me) don't even know how to say Ciarran.

In the end I couldn't finish the novel. Mainly because of the character of the heroine. I admit to having had a fantasy when I was young. For about 2 days while I got used to a new school. That I was secretly 'very special' and that one day a rich handsome popstar guy would fall in love with me and whisk me away from my humdrum life. And this novel is that fantasy brought to life. Except that I would not have been as cloyingly, embarassingly grateful as the cringe-making 28-yo heroine, Clea, of this novel. And the hero is not a popstar but a sweet biker guy with dark shades; a fantastic motorbike; who probably practises a lop-sided grin daily in front of a mirror in order to look mean.

Clea obviously has so little going on in her life. Apart from grief at her grandmother's death. She can't even afford a nice cup of coffee. She gushes pathetically when the hero buys her three types of the frothy brew. Sometimes I got the impression that Ciarran with his fake fawning over the very ordinary Clea read more like a psychotic episode she was experiencing. A total delusion. Signifying 'special' mental health problems. Because the poor dear was in need of some positive strokes.

I felt sorry for her.

Also. Why is the novel called Demon's Kiss? The hero is a Sorcerer. The demons are ugly animal type creatures. I doubt if the heroine ever kisses one of them. Unless maybe they are also rich.

dnf.

Midnight Angel by Lisa Marie Rice

You know. I find it amazing how romance novels from minority publishers are able to address stimulating social issues in an entertaining manner in addition to including the obligatory hot hot earthy nookie.

Anyway. Midnight Angel. It's all about how big ugly Douglas and blind Allegra find true love. In the blink of an eye basically. Seeing how it's an Elloras Cave print novel. There's also a cracking good secondary plot about Allegra being stalked by a low-life killer on the orders of an imprisoned high-life killer.

The big let-down is that the psychological tension is built up very effectively but then the whole situation is resolved much too quickly. In the space of one chapter...because the author ran out of pages....because she spent too much time on the hot hot nookie between big Douglas and blind Allegra...and forgot about the suspense plot. Maybe a decent editor would have helped. On the other hand. Midnight Angel is a romance. So maybe that's the only plot that needed to be completed properly.

Not for one minute did I believe that the main couple have a long-lasting HEA. So much effort was put into depicting Douglas's ugliness. Allegra's gratitude will only last so long. Then it's 'Goodbye Douglas.' Poor man. One broken heart coming up.

The story also touches upon issues like what happens when a girl says 'No' to the men in her life. OMG. The author dares to talk about the political affiliations of the hero. I liked that. Then there's all that alpha, red, 3 o'clock stuff which I didn't understand but enjoyed reading through. Also the main couple have shared interests that bind them. Music, good food.

However. The heroine does unfortunately express some quite intolerant views about her blindness. No excuse. Seeing how she is probably not a Republican! tee hee. Plus Allegra hasn't even begun to feel any guilt about her part in the father's murder. Did she really have no idea that Corey was a psycho waiting to happen? Of course she did. That's why she asked her Pop to go with her to the contract-breaking meeting with Corey. Really another 2 or 3 chapters minimum should have been written in to make the novel a Stephen King-like tome.

Wow! That would have made a magnificent read. And successful too. I'm sure.

The character of Allegra is A Million Times Better than the Vile Dylan from Midnight Rising. Although in the interests of fairness I feel obliged to add both Allegra and Douglas are thoroughly amoral. Allegra because she fakes orgasms (understandable), fakes attraction (why?) and blatantly lies to Douglas about his looks (Acne scars are not 'beautiful.') Douglas because he contracts someone to kill Corey in jail.

A good hot stimulating read for anyone with more than basic education.

Midnight Rising by Lara Adrian

Geez. I cannot believe how much of a slimey amoral inconsiderate b.i.t.c.h. the heroine, Dylan is. She works as a tabloid journalist with her career going nowhere. And even when she did have a career in serious journalism she victimised a completely innocent man. So maybe her nasty nature was to be expected. And making her emotionally dependent on a cancer-ridden mom did nothing to redeem her in my eyes. Geez. The more I read about her the more I disliked her. Nor do I believe that Dylan is beautiful. Maybe a long time ago when she just started college. But not now. Not after working for years in scummy tabloid journalism. With all that smoke, alcohol, foul language and take-out meals. Even by her early 30s she’d have already mutated into a sexless geezer-gal. With about 100 notches on her bed-post. Why would Rio fall for someone like that?

Also. Until now this series has been relatively free of hookers. Unlike the BDB. I don’t find the idea of hookers interesting at all. Let alone do I want to read about them. As far as I can tell from newspapers, hookers are often old or ugly or addicts and prone to pass on social diseases. Often all four. Particularly in continental Europe. Why do people think they are suitable for romances with primarily a female readership? Ugh. (Plus in today's world it just doesn't work as a device for the good woman/bad woman divide. I've read too much about the poverty and brutality that being a hooker involves.) It's pathetic that this author (and her alter-ego) still circulate the stereotype that hookers are second-class citizens by definition.

Midnight Rising is put together in such a way that the heroine first admires the luxury, fine arts, good food of the Darkhaven. Only then does she become receptive to the charms of the hero. Gross! I suppose that the character of Dylan is supposed to be enough life-hardened not to be repulsed by the physical and emotional trauma experienced by Rio in the warehouse explosion. Trouble is. She has absolutely no empathy with anyone's situation but her own. She is transfixed by the thought of fame and money if she manages to get her vampire story into print. Nevermind the consequences for another person, Rio. Actually. Vile Dylan would make a perfect mate for ho-loving Sterling Chase.

In fact I’ve now gone off the whole series. Repeat appearances by lightweight hooker-loving wannabees like Chase, Reichen initially dimmed my enjoyment. And now this awful awful heroine. I will struggle to finish the novel. I probably won’t even bother. Rising is a 350-page novel but by page 150 the hero and heroine haven’t kissed nor are they hardly even friends. As a former reader of the series I do not want any more exposition of Breeds and their mates. I’ve read it all before. At all levels a reincarnated Eva would have made a much better heroine. With Rio falling in love with her all over again and her somehow atoning for what she did. I think I got suckered in by Kiss of Crimson which was a stonking good read. The others have been so so. I actively hated this novel.

I bought this book from the abe network which I accessed from the fantasticfiction website. It was sold as new and even with post and packaging seemed to work out cheaper than amazon. ABE seems to be an excellent seller so long as you buy one book at a time.

ps I have never met a hooker or a journalist. Nor did I ever aspire to become either. (Just thought I'd add that. Most of my 'knowledge' comes from documentaries and broadsheets.)

Bens Wildflower by Carol Lynne

You Have Been Warned.

First. The hero, Ben, is a monster waiting to happen. Constantly professing his love then telling Kate to be ready to take him the minute he feels like whipping it out. Wherever and whenever. Second. I sorta know that some people really really do live lives similar to those portrayed in this story. God help them. Thirdly. This novel is so astoundingly awful that in the end I just gave up being disgusted and went along with the ride. I have to say. In a smack-down between Lover Unbound and Ben’s Wildflower, the latter wins through every time. At least it has a happy ending. A proper full stop.

Ben’s Wildflower has it all and it has absolutely nothing. I’ll start like this. Both the females have been repeatedly violently raped in the past. Off-story. But does it put them off sex? Do either of them ever contemplate for one micro-second to say no the sexual demands of their partners. No Way Jose! Kate and Jenny both love to get Down To It. On their knees, on their backs, with small and big toys, any which way at all and in both holes.

But then. Interspersed with all the quite affecting carnality are scenes of mind-numbingly boring domesticity. Which I skim read. Like I’m interested in how much food the hero eats. This is share-cropper love at it’s most profound. Kate’s pooch almost dies then makes a complete recovery. None of the plot makes sense. I personally felt that somewhere there should have been an orgy scene involving Kate, Jenny, Cree, Jake and Ben.

The story also involves a proper plot about how Kate is nastily victimised by the small-town bully. Who also happens to be supposedly the richest guy in town. Yet again we get a small-town revenge scene where Ben gets a woman who has been disrespectful to Kate, fired. Oh and nicknames. Kate is Ben’s Wildflower. I’m inclined to call her Ben’s simple-minded slut. Unfortunately. According to the plot. Ben is Kate’s only lover apart from her rapist. At some point in the novel, the main couple make a conscious decision not to call their nemesis by his given name, Clint. So instead. For about half of the entire novel they refer to Clint as ‘the little fucker.’ So bizarre.

I absolutely could not empathise with Kate. Through any of her terrible troubles. Why was that? She relied totally on Ben for the resolution of all her problems. Yet she wasn’t any kind of doormat at all. I know for sure Ben will soon turn into massive spousal abuser. All the signs are there. Including his cloying declarations of love to Kate. On the other hand. Maybe not.

For the stout-hearted only. But having said all that. Just today I read a spoiler for Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult. Believe me. It's plot is even more ridiculous. And more offensive.

Feral by Nathalie Gray

Another e-book. Rated e-rotic. Which means it’s supposed to be hot hot hot. But actually I ended up thinking ‘Boy! Some women have to work hard for one simple orgasm.’

Science fiction is not a genre which particularly appeals to me. And this story is totally derivative. Think of a million episodes of Star Trek. And I mean the 70s schtick. What’s more. By the end of this story I was more interested in the secondary characters, Liberty and Cupcake than the main couple Dex and Eva. Not hard when both the hero and heroine have no loyalties, looks or purpose in life. Even Dragana, with her pointless causes and easily roused hatred was more interesting.

I was unimpressed by the circumstances that caused Dex to change form over three times in the story. He’s supposed to change into this big killer lycan only under extreme stressful conditions but towards the end all Eva had to do was give him a smouldering look for it to bring out the big bad wolf in him. How predictable.

This is the first romance I’ve read where the heroine gives the hero some anal teasing. Definitely the first romance where the heroine has unashamedly undegone numerous cosmetic procedures. And the relationship between Eva and Dex was perfectly acceptable and believable. It almost worked how they began to feel genuine emotion for each other. Well. That’s what I thought.

The plot, such as it is, goes nowhere special. Despite all that. I'm quite tempted to read the follow-ups. Primal (which seems to be Liberty's and Cupcake's story) and Carnal (which ventures into Breed territory). To say nothing of the author's vampire story, DamNation. Maybe a couple of her werewolf stories, Wolfsbane and Bains Wolf too. tee hee. She's sort of Lora Leigh hot but without all the offensive male domination, female doormat baggage. I like the length of this novel. 142 pages. I totally object to reading a 400+ page romance only to conclude that I hated everything about it. (ie Harmony's Way, Lover Unbound)