Friday, 14 December 2012

The Hobbit...The movie

It's not that its that bad. And I hardly noticed the long running time because I usually like a good story. What I absolutely hated were the endless animations. This is not a film for adults.

Just some of the animations; The trolls. The wargs. Goblins, orcs. The Pale Orc King. The flabby goblin King. The animals of the Green Wood. The proto-Ringwraith. The pathetic scenes with the Storm Giants. And yes. Because he's one of them, Gollum. I'm sick of his schtick.

I hated them all. Because they are so dated. Because they are so obviously people in plastic prosthetics.

But more more than that, I hated the way Jackson badly ripped off so many scenes from his own LOTR trilogy for this piece of tripe. A few of the offending scenes being; the dwarves chased by the wargs over scrubland is a pale ripoff of Gimli and co meeting Eomer in the Riddermark, the completely ludicrous chase through the orc kingdom with the dwarfs slaying hundreds of orcs without even one of the dwarfs being injured is a complete and totally second rate ripoff of the chase through Moria in LOTR.

Also no new music. The score from the original LOTR trilogy is basically regurgitated for The Hobbit. wtf!! Yes the music is Exactly The Same!!!

And finally. I looked at the titular lead actor. I could not see how the morose Freeman Bilbo Baggins could ever become the happy giggly Ian Holm Bilbo. The Freeman Bilbo Baggins is a miserable nonentity. The Holm Bilbo Baggins exuded personality. I think that is called miscasting. But you know what. I don't actually believe that was Ian Holm's voice in The Hobbit. It sounded completely different in many scenes.

Such a disappointment. Along with Prometheus and TDKR. But at least they were movies for grown-ups. The Hobbit is just infantile poop.

Well. That needed to be said.

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